ISACS Parent Series Recap - The Great Rewiring

 

Happy Thanksgiving break! I hope that you are enjoying the time off and embracing the start of the holidays! While I understand why Christmas is a favorite holiday for most, Thanksgiving is top of the list for me. A day where the expectation is to eat, watch football, and spend time with loved ones checks all of my boxes! For my family, November is a difficult month as it brings birthdays and anniversaries of loved ones that we have lost. However, every year at this time I am reminded of how lucky I am for the people I have in my life, and am reminded to embrace the phase of life that I am in. There is always something positive even in difficult times, so despite challenges that the holidays may bring, I hope that you and your family are soaking up quality time with one another and making new memories. That is what this time of year is truly about! 

The October ISACS Parent Series was presented by Jonathan Haidt - a social psychologist and bestselling author. His presentation titled, How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Impacted Everything & What We Can Do About It, was full of valuable information on how to protect our children from the impacts of smartphones and social media. Haidt began by asking listeners to imagine tree roots growing in the sidewalk. The roots are guided by the environment as they grow, just like the neurons in our brains. Our genes don’t tell our neurons where to grow, nor do the tree’s genes tell the roots where to grow. Rather the tree roots and our brains wire themselves based on the feedback from their environment. So as tree roots are guided by obstacles on the ground, studies are showing that our brains are beginning to grow in response to our smartphones. 

Haidt describes “The Great Rewiring of Childhood” in two Acts. Act 1: play-based childhood and Act 2: phone-based childhood. While play-based childhood needs no explanation, it is important to note that this type of childhood phased out in 2010 with the introduction of the first smartphone. Specifically one with a forward facing camera and high speed internet. The beginning of the phone-based childhood is the societal shift from play to overprotecting our kids in the real world and grossly underprotecting them online. Haidt describes the damage cause by this shift as follows: 

Physical: Physical changes such as “pinky finger”, “text neck”, the lengthening of our eyeballs, poor sleep, and an increase in obesity rates are proof that overuse of phones is impacting us physically. Pinky finger, for example, is a physical change in your child’s hand as they grow. The longer you hold your phone, the more likely your pinky will grow outward.

Mental: Gen Z arrives around 2014 with an epidemic of psychological problems. Haidt describes them as the most mentally ill generation we have seen. From 2010-2015 (the time of the Great Rewiring) anxiety and depression in youth skyrocketed with the following statistics to back it up:

• Girls have higher rates, with more than 40% of girls having a mental disorder 
• Self-harm (cutting, overdoses, etc.) among early teens (10-14 year olds) tripled from 2010-2014 
• Suicide rates in girls saw a 67% increase in 2013; whereas boys had a 109% increase in 2010 

Attention fragmentation and educational decline: Since the Great Rewiring, youth and adults are reporting more and more cognitive challenges such as, the ability to pay attention, ability to learn new things, retaining information, etc. Haidt states that phones are quite literally making our kids dumber with data showing an unprecedented reversal of academic performance in 2012 (following the introduction of the smartphone). Smartphones and social media monopolize time at home, as well as at school starting in 2015. Students have hundreds of interruptions throughout the day due to notifications so it’s no wonder they can’t focus. One student reported, “I read a few sentences and then get bored and go on TikTok”. Students ages 15-16 began reporting that they feel alienated at school due to the presence of phones - social interactions decrease, halls become quieter, and rather than face-to-face conversation, kids’ priority is knowing where people are and what they are posting on social media. 

Spiritual degradation: Another impact from the Great Rewiring is a decline in spiritual development. Smartphones and social media block most paths to spiritual experience and growth, and more and more youth are reporting that they don’t see meaning in life and are struggling to find an overall purpose. 

Haidt finished his focus on the damage of this era by describing the differences seen between boys and girls. For girls, low self-esteem, and an increase in relational aggression and self-harm have all been side effects of heavy social media use. For boys, we are seeing them retreat from the real world and dive full force into the virtual world. With the constant dopamine hits from video games, sports betting (to name a few), there is a major decrease in drive/motivation, face-to-face interactions, and an increase in addictions to unhealthy material and substances. Haidt describes boys as “dopamine bait” and are the most susceptible to toxic online cultures and advertisements for things such as vaping.  

So what is the solution? Haidt explains that we need to establish FOUR NORMS to help reverse the impacts of smartphones and social media. 

Norm #1: No smartphone before high school

• Only give your child a flip phone or simple phone/watch, with no internet. This includes iPads (if possible).
• Identify what is good vs bad screen time:
  • GOOD: Story time - a long story (movie) about people in a world with moral values, watching on a big screen with another person is even better. Ensure that your child is not multitasking while watching 
  • BAD: Fragmented time - watching short, amoral videos, and allowing your child to jump to different videos as things get boring 

Norm #2: No social media before age 16 

• Puberty is the worst time to give our child a smartphone and social media. Let them get through puberty first … It’s hard enough itself! You, as parents, should be the ones teaching them, don’t let it be online influencers 

Norm #3: Phone-free schools

Norm #4: More independence, free play, and responsibility in the real world 

Emphasizing the importance of play and gaining independence to children is crucial. Our children are SO capable and we are often the ones that hinder their ability to thrive without knowing we are doing so. Think about what age you went outside and played on your own, or rode your bike around the neighborhood on your own. Society has shifted the age in which we allow our children to explore and learn by playing and we are seeing the impacts. 

At Oakhill we feel like these experiences are important. We aim to teach our students independence and responsibility through play and new experiences. If you are a parent of a child in Lower School or Intermediate, in the coming weeks you can expect communication about a program I am starting called The LetGrow Experience. The idea behind the LetGrow Experience is to let your child do new things on their own. Each month, your child will pick something that you’ve never done before (that is age appropriate) and do it by themselves. Your child may be nervous or scared to try new things, but that is GOOD. When we challenge them to step out of their comfort zone and be independent, they realize just how capable they are and that they CAN work through feelings of anxiousness and be okay. My goal with this program is to give each student the opportunity to learn, grow, and be proud of their accomplishments. 

As always, reach out with thoughts or questions! 

 

Mrs. P